The Day Everything Important Starts

Tomorrow.

Seriously. Your diet starts tomorrow right? Don’t be ashamed of the oreos, I just drank Pepsi. I don’t even like Pepsi, or any soda for that matter.

Tomorrow, I will write more.

Tomorrow, I will read more.

Be kinder to people. Clean more. Sing more. Do more.

No.

NO.

Non.

Tomorrow needs to start being today, for me and probably for a lot of you out there.

I have grand thoughts like these all the time.

TODAY I’m going to start eating healthy.

TODAY I’m going to start going to the gym every day.

TODAY I’m going to stop being lazy and edit those damn articles.

Yeah, right.

February. That’s when my 1,001 count down begins. But I think these next few weeks should probably be training weeks. I plan on working out, drinking protein shakes, forgoing alcohol and drugs (like chocolate), cleaning my room, and grocery shopping for things that will make my life easier, like toilet paper.

Why is starting so difficult for me? Once I get going, things just roll along, it’s the start that is so difficult. It’s like trying to fly Santa’s sleigh when nobody believes in the magic of Christmas. It won’t fly! I need to fly!!

So, I’m going to add more to this Day Zero Project list and hope that having you beaux gens out there reading will hold me to my goals. Because let’s be real, being a public failure is worse than just failing that little promise you whispered to yourself in the mirror this morning when you hiked your pants up like mom jeans in an effort to hide the extra shtuff you’ve got going on.

1. Go Vegan. Well, almost. No dairy, no red meat. Poultry and Seafood get a green light. So what does that make me?

2. Write and publish 4 food articles a month. Thank God this starts in February because mine are backed up from December. Seriously I have 5 restaurant articles and haven’t done a damn thing with them because I’m a perfectionist and need to edit everything (except my blog) at least 7 million times over (the blog I only re-read 2.7 million times before publishing).

3. Swim. It’s physical therapy. No, seriously, I have this whole ‘I-was-born-with-bilateral-hip-displasia-and-had-to-have-bilateral-hip-reconstruction-and-now-I-walk-but-they-still-hurt-and-I’ll-probably-need-a-hip-replacement-soon’ story that could seriously be benefitted by swimming. It makes me walk better, feel better, move better. If I were having sex, it’d probably make that better too.

4. Volunteer. Regularly. You know it makes you happier to help people. Makes you less lazy too, so get up off the damn couch, Bell.

Ok, so that means out of 101 things I have to complete in 1,001 days, I have 8. Only 93 more to add to the list.

Mon Dieu.

French Lesson

(les) beaux gens. Beautiful people. 
Mon Dieu
. My God.  (I know I know, he’s yours too.)

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